Now that Charlie Sheen has weighed in on the Duck Dynasty flap, it’s safe to say we can all move on.

Sheen waded into the aftermath of a GQ interview with Phil Robertson, the patriarch of the Duck Dynasty family, in which he said offensive things about gays and lesbians, Muslims, African-Americans, non-Christians and pretty much everyone else.

For instance: “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men,” he said, going on to paraphrase Corinthians: “Don’t be deceived. Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy, the drunkards, the slanderers, the swindlers — they won’t inherit the kingdom of God. Don’t deceive yourself. It’s not right.”

Since then Robertson, who was soon after suspended by A&E, has been vehemently defended by conservatives — including one Republican congressional candidate who compared Robertson to Rosa Parks.

Sheen, on the other hand, was not all that pleased with the comments, and offered up another one of his loosely comprehensible poems to explain his feelings:

“hey Mallard brained

Phil Robertso!

you have offended and hurt so many dear friends of mine,

who DO NOT have the voice or the outreach that I do.

well news flash


I will speak loudly and clearly for ALL of them.


just when your desperately sub evolved ass thought the pressure was off,

you are now in the crosshairs of a MaSheen style media

beat down.

(I’ll try to keep the big words to a minimum as not to confuse you)

your statements were and are

abhorrently and

mendaciously unforgivable.”

You can read the rest of the poem here.

Last time Sheen went lyrical on a news story it was to offer Rob Ford, Toronto’s crack-smoking mayor, his moral support. So take note, Phil Robertson — it’s safe to say that when Charlie Sheen finds you unsympathetic, you’ve got something of an image problem.

Watch the kind of outdoor sporting life Phil Roberston loves on The Pursuit Channel via FilmOn.

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