The erstwhile Hills hottie announced over the weekend that she’s getting hitched to her boyfriend William Tell, former piano player and backup vocalist for Something Corporate and current something corporate-in-training as a UCLA law student, who she’s been dating for a year and a half.
Tell popped the question with a stylish, yet sizeable solitaire ring, and while we’re sure the proposal was beautiful, we can’t help but wonder about the loves that never even got the chance at their own spin-off with her.
Stephen Coletti: One of Lauren’s first boyfriends (at least on TV), Stephen was the kind of charming doofus every teenage girl dates, and the first one that makes her dad start making off-color jokes about second amendment rights. If Stephen ever got around to making things official with LC, we’re guessing his proposal would have included a boogie boarding lesson, a ring lost to the waves, and probably, by the end of the night, Kristin Cavallari.
Jason Wahler: Everybody’s got one of these guys in their past — for the stylish Lauren, it was a bit incongruous to see her with a guy who loved stiffly gelled hair, always had a few too many buttons undone, and just could not stop getting arrested, but hey, we get it. Prison weddings are cheap and come with fun, free decoration. Unfortunately, the same weekend Lauren got engaged, Jason took himself off the market with a wedding of his own, so their love story may never be.
Brody Jenner: The Brodster dated Lauren for a minute after dating her nemesis Kristin Cavallari (do we see a pattern here?), but things never made it past a faked reality show ending for the two. However, if they could make an entire season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians based on Kim’s supposed interest in Kris Humphries, we’re sure they could muster up a storyline about a Brody/Lauren engagement at D-A-S-H Miami for sweeps.